I came from Malaysia, east Malaysia, and I came here in 92.

I got married in 1994, and had my son, who was born with Down Syndrome, in 1995. He is 8 years old now, so just by myself [ I have been looking after him since] 3 years ago, when [his] father left us.

I have been with EDAC since they were in the city. That was maybe 3 or 4 years ago. I have joined every support group: EDAC, Red Cross, you name it, I am there. It gives me [a] chance to meet other mothers and talk about our problems. Because it is not easy when you are by yourself.

At that time, I was really by myself. I had nobody to turn to, nobody to talk to. And of course my husband, all I get from him is condemnation, "You this, you that," everything. You name it. The worst part of it [was] the allegations -- the bad word. Because I am older at that time, I gave birth when I was 45. So he said I produced a very disabled child. And you know when somebody condemn you, how do you feel?

That is why I was depressed for 2 years. I am still. Each time look at my son, even though he is improving and I've got God to thank for that -- but the scar, you know, it is still in you. Even though you try to suppress it, but every time when something comes up, like this morning when we discuss, it reopens again. The wound opens. And you start feeling hurt again.

And that is the reason we can never forget what's happened. But anyway life has to go on. Like I said my son is improving. When people told me it is a joy to have a Down Syndrome child, at that time I didn't understand what they are talking about. But as I see it, living with my son every day, the joy he is giving to me, the support, he is a very supportive little boy! Even though he is a bit stubborn, but I think that all child[ren] are stubborn. We can go around it.

But I say that 70% is very good. You would be happy to have a child like that. I'm just waiting, you know, hoping, praying every day that he will be totally, his character, his behaviour, his mentality [will] be normal, like other kids. It's hard, you know, whenever you see other kids so normal, and you always ask yourself, "Why me?" What else can we do when they are already with us? We have to accept. We can't reject anything that is in us.

You have to live with it. You have to go on, move on with your life even though his father left us, but life ha[s] to go on. We just have to live with it, look after him, and hope that when he grows up that he will be able to live independently, because I won't be here by that time, so hoping for the best for him.

7.